Pooping Pegasus

Creatures from the depths of the internet, I summon thee from atop my unicorned pegasus who poops on anyone and anything I command. Down there, quick! I see a man pointing up at us, waving his arms. Hello down there! Yes! I see you. Poop on him pegasus! And circle back so we can do it again!

He's running now, protecting his eyes, covered in poop number one. Here goes poop number two! Got him! A direct hit! He's screaming mad things up at us—curses! He's shouting up a shit storm of unicorned pegasuses to appear from above us and cover us! Plop! Splat! They're already upon us! Fly higher pegasus! Faster! And unicorn them to death!

Gross! I didn't know they would explode like balloons full of poop! Pop! Splatter! Make it rain! And that one too! Pop! Cool! That one was filled with glitter! Sparkling! Showering! Sprinkling everything with golden flakes of foil. Pop! Poop! Pop! Cereal! Pop! Poop again. I want to find another one that glitters!

Pop! That's the last one, and it's another pooper.

Looks like I need to go get cleaned off somewhere. I know just the place. The cave of dog tongues. Pegasus! Take me there! Land on the river and hold it open with your hoof so I can jump down inside and roll around the licking lapping sucking off my dirty clothes and wallow in a naked happy ending.